Was Timothy married? I don't know. I don't think anyone living today knows for certain if he was married or not. If he wasn't, his acting in the office of an Elder would have been an exception to the rule; in fact, he would have been in clear violation of the plainly-stated criteria issued by Paul and thus cannot serve as an example to follow in regards to being an Elder.
Lord Jesus loved everyone, he shed God's grace on the most marginalized people during his ministry - Samaritan, tax collector, leper, prostitute, people whom decent and proud Jews shunned and despised. The only group he hated and repeatedly criticized was the hypocrites who talk the talk but don't walk the walk. By suggesting Timothy, the recepient of these qualification instructions an "exception to the rule", you're making him a hypocrite. You can argue that Paul was an "apostle", not an "elder" or a "bishop," but Timothy most definitely was, appointed by Paul personally to preside the Euphesian church, according to the plainly-stated words of God.
As I urged you when I went into Macedonia—
remain in Ephesus that you may charge some that they teach no other doctrine, nor give heed to fables and endless genealogies, which cause disputes rather than godly edification which is in faith. (1 Tim. 1:3)
The practice of the "Apostolic Fathers" does not dissolve the plainly-stated stipulation of Paul in God's word that an Elder was to be both a husband and father. Historical fact does not trump the clear declaration of divine Scripture.
You're presenting a false dichotomy, a logical fallacy you onced accused me of. Scripture is divine because it's perfectly aligned with historical fact. History is His story, God's story validates God's words. This is not my opinion, it's God's word spoken through Moses. God knows our misgivings, and He asks us to scrutinize any message spoken in the name of God through a reality check - which is "historical fact". Therefore, according to "plainly-stated stipulation" in God's word, show me any historical evidence that this Timothy had faithfully followed this "husband and father requirement" to the teeth. Show me how this requirement had come to pass for Timothy. Show me any evidence of that he had wife and children. It is not I, but GOD'S WORD demands so. There were biblical texts that indicate he was a young man who still lived with his parents at the time Paul met him, and he was appointed as the head of Ephesian church, which was effectively an elder.
What you fail to understand is that God is consistent, what also doesn't trump the clear declaration of divine Scripture is OTHER clear declaration of divine Scripture.
And if you say in your heart, ‘How shall we know the word which the Lord has not spoken?’— when a prophet speaks in the name of the Lord,
if the thing does not happen or come to pass, that is the thing which the Lord has not spoken; the prophet has spoken it presumptuously; you shall not be afraid of him. (Deut. 18:21-22)