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do i have to be happy, joyful appearance

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I'm sorry, but this is all foolishness and so against the word of God.

Gods' grand design was for man to take care of the earth and have dominion over all living things. God knew this was to big a job for one man so he created man a helpmate and called her woman. The two were to multiply and replenish the earth with more helpers to till the land and help take care of Gods creation, Genesis 1, 2.

Gods will for woman was to be a helpmate to the man in every way, mentally, spiritually, emotionally, socially and physically. She was also created to bare the generations to come. A woman was not greater or less than the man, but was his equal.

Within perfection soon came imperfection when woman was deceived and disobeyed what God told her and man not to eat of. Man did not take his spiritual authority over the woman and now sin had entered into the hearts of all man and woman and they hid themselves from the voice of God. As the population grew and sin ran ramped laws had to be added for the transgressions. God saw that the people needed guidance to come back to him for so many fell away from the voice of God. The more immortality gave place to the adding of more laws until man twisted the laws of God and created new ones to justify their deeds. There are now over 613 Levitical or Mosaic laws that were given to the Israelite to follow, Exodus 20:1-17.

There is no place in the Bible that constitutes having to have a marriage license. Man incorporated this into the law. In the Hebrew tradition a mohar or dowry was paid to the father of the bride by the groom in exchange for the daughter, Exodus 22:17. Genesis 2:23-25 explains the bond of marriage. The two are united as one in the eyes of God. Ephesians 5:22-29 wives are to submit to their husbands as unto the Lord for the husband is the spiritual head of the wife. Man is the provider and protector of his family. Husbands, you are to love your wives like Christ loves his church. This is an unconditional love that looks on the inside of a person and not the adorning of the outside. It is a love with a pure heart.
That was the ideal marriage according to God's original design, but nobody could keep it, at Moses's time divorce was allowed because of the hardness of their hearts, at Jesus's time it was greatly perverted as pharisees divorced for any frivilous reason and then quickly remarried. When the disciples drew the conclusion that it's better not to marry at all, Jesus didn't rebuke them, he simply told them that marriage is not for everyone, not everyone can keep such a commitment of a lifetime. That doesn't explain why I was being foolish, I didn't deviate from any word of God. In Hebrew tradition and many other cultures' traditions in the ancient time, most marriages were arranged, usually parents or a professional matchmaker will find a suitable partner for the kid; and if a match was made, then a mohar or dowry will be paid, as you said, and they were betrothed to each other. How does that play out in modern time when the Supreme Court has permenantly redefined and corrupted marriage?

To be honest, I've heard messenges against marriage frequently from the pulpit - your spouse doesn't complete you, Jesus does; our deepest desire is a desire for God, not romance or sex; dating is idolatry, God must come first. If we're to love with a pure heart, unconditionally and selflessly, then it can't be tainted with lust, with carnal desire that is aroused by "adorning the outside". If there's any sexual thought popping up in your mind, then your heart wouldn't be pure, and that would ruin it. Isn't that the "purity culture" as the counter measure of the "sexual revolution"? How did that work out? It is covert idolatry, you know, if you put your spouse, kid or marriage above God, and that's what I'm afraid of.
 
That was the ideal marriage according to God's original design, but nobody could keep it, at Moses's time divorce was allowed because of the hardness of their hearts, at Jesus's time it was greatly perverted as pharisees divorced for any frivilous reason and then quickly remarried. When the disciples drew the conclusion that it's better not to marry at all, Jesus didn't rebuke them, he simply told them that marriage is not for everyone, not everyone can keep such a commitment of a lifetime. That doesn't explain why I was being foolish, I didn't deviate from any word of God. In Hebrew tradition and many other cultures' traditions in the ancient time, most marriages were arranged, usually parents or a professional matchmaker will find a suitable partner for the kid; and if a match was made, then a mohar or dowry will be paid, as you said, and they were betrothed to each other. How does that play out in modern time when the Supreme Court has permenantly redefined and corrupted marriage?

To be honest, I've heard messenges against marriage frequently from the pulpit - your spouse doesn't complete you, Jesus does; our deepest desire is a desire for God, not romance or sex; dating is idolatry, God must come first. If we're to love with a pure heart, unconditionally and selflessly, then it can't be tainted with lust, with carnal desire that is aroused by "adorning the outside". If there's any sexual thought popping up in your mind, then your heart wouldn't be pure, and that would ruin it. Isn't that the "purity culture" as the counter measure of the "sexual revolution"? How did that work out? It is covert idolatry, you know, if you put your spouse, kid or marriage above God, and that's what I'm afraid of.
All this talk about marriage, living the life of a eunuch or a monk is taking us way off of topic of the OP. It was nice chatting with you, but I need to walk away from our conversations, You have a good evening.
 
All this talk about marriage, living the life of a eunuch or a monk is taking us way off of topic of the OP. It was nice chatting with you, but I need to walk away from our conversations, You have a good evening.
I think it's pretty relevant to the OP, because if we're living the life of a eunuch or a monk, either by choice or by circumstance, then we're unlikely to be happy and joyful. I can be calm, content and collected, but I can't put up a happy and joyful appearance when I'm in loneliness and isolation. Jesus taught that a worthy disciple must bear his cross and count the cost, maybe this is it.
 

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