Bible Study To forgive

[arunangelo]

To forgive is to wipe-off the offenses of our offenders. In order to wipe-off the offenses the offenders must reject sin. Since, only the spirit of God’s love will enable us to reject sin, we must enable our offenders to embrace this spirit by expressing God’s love and compassion towards them. We must always remember that when we sinned God did not condemn us. Instead, by his sacrifice on the cross he instilled the spirit of true love in our hearts; which enables us to reject sin and accept forgiveness. Therefore, we must never refuse to forgive others; because when we refuse to forgive, we reject the spirit of God’s love and the forgiveness that comes from it.

 

[Deborah13]

 

[Eugene]

 

[AirDancer]

Brilliantly said, arunangelo ! Thank you!

 

[for_his_glory]

Mar 11:23 For verily I say unto you, That whosoever shall say unto this mountain, Be thou removed, and be thou cast into the sea; and shall not doubt in his heart, but shall believe that those things which he saith shall come to pass; he shall have whatsoever he saith.
Mar 11:24 Therefore I say unto you, What things soever ye desire, when ye pray, believe that ye receive them, and ye shall have them.
Mar 11:25 And when ye stand praying, forgive, if ye have ought against any: that your Father also which is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses.
Mar 11:26 But if ye do not forgive, neither will your Father which is in heaven forgive your trespasses.

 

[Chopper]

This is a very good thread arunangelo. Forgiveness is an extremely important part of being a Christian. In marriage counseling, I have come in contact with folk that say "I can forgive, but I can't forget. Here lies the big problem in many interpersonal problems between two believers.

The remedy for this "I can't forget" is found in 1 Corinthians 13:5 (NIV) "Love....keeps no record of wrongs" We must forgive by God's standards, not mans. You see, God forgives us and then Scripture says that He "remembers them no more". God in His justice system forgives and forgets. Does this mean that God is like me in that I'm very forgetful? No, it means that He decrees that in Himself, He sends our sin's away from His remembrance so that He will never bring that sin, or sins up against me to judge me.

We must operate like God, just like the Corinthian verse demands. We must never bring up a sin that someone has asked forgiveness for ever again. I here people say, "you know what you did last year", no, we must not bring that sin to our remembrance to hurt that person. God doesn't, why should we.

 

[Deborah13]

This is a very good thread arunangelo. Forgiveness is an extremely important part of being a Christian. In marriage counseling, I have come in contact with folk that say "I can forgive, but I can't forget. Here lies the big problem in many interpersonal problems between two believers.

The remedy for this "I can't forget" is found in 1 Corinthians 13:5 (NIV) "Love....keeps no record of wrongs" We must forgive by God's standards, not mans. You see, God forgives us and then Scripture says that He "remembers them no more". God in His justice system forgives and forgets. Does this mean that God is like me in that I'm very forgetful? No, it means that He decrees that in Himself, He sends our sin's away from His remembrance so that He will never bring that sin, or sins up against me to judge me.

We must operate like God, just like the Corinthian verse demands. We must never bring up a sin that someone has asked forgiveness for ever again. I here people say, "you know what you did last year", no, we must not bring that sin to our remembrance to hurt that person. God doesn't, why should we.

Should I wait to forgive someone, especially my spouse, until they say they are sorry or ask for forgiveness ?

 

[for_his_glory]

I still remember what others have done against me, but instead of dwelling on it I use it as a witness and a testimony of how God instructs us to forgive and also to pray for our oppressors.

 

[Deborah13]

I still remember what others have done against me, but instead of dwelling on it I use it as a witness and a testimony of how God instructs us to forgive and also to pray for our oppressors.

 

[Chopper]

Should I wait to forgive someone, especially my spouse, until they say they are sorry or ask for forgiveness ?

Some believers do. I believe a mature believer will forgive that person regardless whether they ask forgiveness or not. Our minds should be free from irritation from the faults of other people. It's a big Christian when they can overlook the faults of others. A prideful person does not look at their own shortcomings, just the other person. Listen, I'm not perfect, why should I expect others to be. If a person does something against me that would require that person to ask forgiveness, I don't require it because I've done things to that person that I should ask their forgiveness. It's a prideful person that says, "I haven't done anything".

A situation comes to my mind whereas this couple that I was renting a house from, took advantage of my Wife and I and really treated us bad. They were Christians and knew that they were wrong. To this day they have not asked forgiveness. I simply gave the offense over to my Lord, after all, He is the One who watches over me. That couple was no different than me. Somewhere in the past I probably offended someone so why should I expect anything different. Their sin doesn't smell any worse than mine.

We are to be MATURE, not little children holding grudges, or not forgiving someone who has offended me.

 

[Deborah13]

Some believers do. I believe a mature believer will forgive that person regardless whether they ask forgiveness or not. Our minds should be free from irritation from the faults of other people. It's a big Christian when they can overlook the faults of others. A prideful person does not look at their own shortcomings, just the other person. Listen, I'm not perfect, why should I expect others to be. If a person does something against me that would require that person to ask forgiveness, I don't require it because I've done things to that person that I should ask their forgiveness. It's a prideful person that says, "I haven't done anything".

A situation comes to my mind whereas this couple that I was renting a house from, took advantage of my Wife and I and really treated us bad. They were Christians and knew that they were wrong. To this day they have not asked forgiveness. I simply gave the offense over to my Lord, after all, He is the One who watches over me. That couple was no different than me. Somewhere in the past I probably offended someone so why should I expect anything different. Their sin doesn't smell any worse than mine.

We are to be MATURE, not little children holding grudges, or not forgiving someone who has offended me.

I really agree with this. I think it is especially important with our spouses if we want to have a loving, peaceful, environment in our homes. It's so important for our children's sakes, too.
I think a lot of times woman want to settle things right now and men need space to think and mull things over. I learned with mine to let it rest and nine times out of ten, things are smoothed over before the day/evening is over. It truly is best not to let the sun go down on one's anger. Eph. 4:26

 

[Chopper]

I really agree with this. I think it is especially important with our spouses if we want to have a loving, peaceful, environment in our homes. It's so important for our children's sakes, too.
I think a lot of times woman want to settle things right now and men need space to think and mull things over. I learned with mine to let it rest and nine times out of ten, things are smoothed over before the day/evening is over. It truly is best not to let the sun go down on one's anger. Eph. 4:26

Absolutely Deb. Good reply. That is what mature believers do. I tell married with children, if you settle conflicts with anger, shouting etc. guess how your children will settle conflict.

 

[for_his_glory]

My husband knows if I am mad that I need a cooling down time by myself and not to be disturbed, but he wants to talk about it right there and then and that's when I rip him a new one because he didn't allow me to cool down first, but then we finally forgive each other as we will never go to bed angry. He is my gift from God, but I still want to bop him sometimes, LOL.

 

[Deborah13]

My husband knows if I am mad that I need a cooling down time by myself and not to be disturbed, but he wants to talk about it right there and then and that's when I rip him a new one because he didn't allow me to cool down first, but then we finally forgive each other as we will never go to bed angry. He is my gift from God, but I still want to bop him sometimes, LOL.

 

[agua.]

My husband knows if I am mad that I need a cooling down time by myself and not to be disturbed, but he wants to talk about it right there and then and that's when I rip him a new one because he didn't allow me to cool down first, but then we finally forgive each other as we will never go to bed angry. He is my gift from God, but I still want to bop him sometimes, LOL.

Why don't you want to talk about it. C'mon what's wrong is it this or that or the other ?

 

[for_his_glory]

Why don't you want to talk about it. C'mon what's wrong is it this or that or the other ?

It's not that I don't want to talk, it's just that my tongue will speak stupid things if I don't calm down first

 

[Chopper]

It's not that I don't want to talk, it's just that my tongue will speak stupid things if I don't calm down first

That's very wise Debbie. Men are usually problem solvers. A man sees a problem and they want it fixed right away. Women are feeling oriented, an offense or conflict goes deep inside her, and she needs time to evaluate the conflict. Otherwise she will respond with her feelings, and the man won't be able to figure out where she is coming from, because she "feels it" and can't right away put it to words. When she does, the remedy will probably be the best of the two because she, as long as she is a Christian, will sense what the Holy Spirit desires. OK men, don't get upset. Because the woman is feeling oriented, she is able to hear that still small voice of the Holy Spirit better than man can. When men stop in the middle of a conflict and take time to pray and listen for the Holy Spirit to speak to his heart, he is just as "in tune" with God's Spirit as the woman....In both cases, what Debbie said is true of both parties. STOP, time out! calm down! Seek the wisdom of the Holy Spirit and you'd be surprised at the outcome, it might be the same resolution in both minds.

 

[agua.]

It's not that I don't want to talk, it's just that my tongue will speak stupid things if I don't calm down first

Yes but why what's wrong why can't we talk about it is it because of this that or something else tell me ?

 

[for_his_glory]

That's very wise Debbie. Men are usually problem solvers. A man sees a problem and they want it fixed right away. Women are feeling oriented, an offense or conflict goes deep inside her, and she needs time to evaluate the conflict. Otherwise she will respond with her feelings, and the man won't be able to figure out where she is coming from, because she "feels it" and can't right away put it to words. When she does, the remedy will probably be the best of the two because she, as long as she is a Christian, will sense what the Holy Spirit desires. OK men, don't get upset. Because the woman is feeling oriented, she is able to hear that still small voice of the Holy Spirit better than man can. When men stop in the middle of a conflict and take time to pray and listen for the Holy Spirit to speak to his heart, he is just as "in tune" with God's Spirit as the woman....In both cases, what Debbie said is true of both parties. STOP, time out! calm down! Seek the wisdom of the Holy Spirit and you'd be surprised at the outcome, it might be the same resolution in both minds.

well said my friend

 

[for_his_glory]

Yes but why what's wrong why can't we talk about it is it because of this that or something else tell me ?

In my case I want to talk about it, but I need to get rid of the anger inside of me first and that's a good thing as I allow the Holy Spirit calm me down. Usually our arguments are that of not understanding what the other one is saying and we are both bullheaded. We always talk it out and then our world is good again.