Let's talk about homosexuality (again!)

[PrimFinallyFoundGod!]

Some of you guys might remember when I made a post about having same-sex attraction and navigating beginner Christianity. It kinda blew up on the site and I had some great healthy discussions with many of you!

It's been quite a while now. I've grown in my faith considerably and continue to. It has recently occurred to me that the same-sex attraction has become weaker & I appreciate my fiance's masculinity when I previously blanked it due to having attraction to femininity.

I do still find women attractive but when I have those thoughts basically I remind myself I am committed to my fiance and said attraction is unnatural anyway. I manually change the attraction from romantic/lust into simply an appreciation of beauty much like a straight woman feels when she sees a fellow woman and thinks she is beautiful. (If I make sense.)

It's been getting a lot easier over time. I've also completely stopped engaging with pornography and self-serving activity which I'm mentioning because I believe that change has contributed to my same-sex attraction being weaker.

I just felt I'd be a hypocrite not to post this as my initial post was an honest open account of what life is like when you're a Christian but you have same-sex attraction, and this is an important follow-up as I feel we as a community can learn from honest experiences and not just people's assumptions pushed on us by media.

I don't feel empty, deprived or miserable. I feel more peaceful actually. And closer to my partner.

The mainstream understanding is that sexuality is totally fixed and can not change, and any attempt to change it is dangerous and causes misery. I can't go with a narrative if I'm not living that narrative anymore.

Could this be an act of God? Or is it more about me turning away from sin and having my priorities in life be more God-orientated? Perhaps it is both! I think it is interesting to theorize.

I'd love to answer any questions you have about the topic! I'm here to be 100% honest as I feel this is how we can help the community understand the issue better, whether you are a Christian with same-sex attractions or on the flip side a firm straight Christian who has questions.

 

[Christ_empowered]

I dunno

I’m happy for you! Women I think are understood to be more sexually fluid…at least I think in psychoanalytic theory. So maybe it’s a natural progression of things stemming from your decision to not turn towards the ladies again? At any rate…

Awesome I’m gay 110 percent. My blessings from Christ in that area have more to do with me being foppish not flamboyantly gay and not given over to my desires. So…

The Lord works differently in each person’s life. Maybe this is part of His long term plan for you? I’m inclined to think so anyway…

 

[evenifigoalone]

Good to hear from you.
Some do believe sexuality to be more fluid, others might say someone like you was bisexual all along and just repressed or something. Not really for them to decide. You're the expert on your own life and should speak your truth.

I still am romantically attracted to the same sex (homoromantic). Still also asexual, and don't want to be heterosexual (or homosexual, or bisexual). I don't really find my romantic attractions to be bothersome overall. And I don't really desire change, or think I need it.

I know lots of homosexuals who asked for change, and never got it. Still haven't got it. Sometimes God grants things. Sometimes He doesn't. His wisdom doesn't operate according to our standards.

 

[Anaphora]

If you Sincerely changed?. Proverbs chapter 1, many people are not sincere and diligent about God. God won't listen to their prayers or bless them.
I'm not judging anyone.
If the person converted to christianity and repentance of sins to God, Acts chapter 3. God forgives sins. Know this. No one can con God. Jesus knows what everyone is thinking and their motives.

James chapter 1, be doers of the word, not hearers only, deceiving your own selves. This is bottom line.
Galatians chapter 5, walking in the flesh is the downfall for many people. Being led by the spirit, is being doers of God's word. Get the picture.

My brother, narcissist, joined church recently. I'm not judging him. Its smoke screen. He believes in rapture theory and listening to traditions of men.
God hates false teachings. Will God listen to Christian who is involved with false doctrine??. The answer is obvious.

Peace.

 

[eddif]

Could this be an act of God? Or is it more about me turning away from sin and having my priorities in life be more God-orientated? Perhaps it is both! I think it is interesting to theorize.

Romans 8:18-19 kjv
18. For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh,) dwelleth no good thing: for to will is present with me; but how to perform that which is good I find not.
19. For the good that I would I do not: but the evil which I would not, that I do.

Philippians 2:13 kjv
13. For it is God which worketh in you both to will and to do of his good pleasure.

I believe we can get to the will part much easier than the do part of life.

Any area of life fits this concept.

Mississippi redneck
eddif

 

[Christ_empowered]

I lean Calvinist. That’s not to start a debate it’s just so you know what I bring to the discussion. So…

Genuine conversions are a work of God. God changes His people over time. Active homosexual lifestyles are not of God. So…

I think and believe He will put off the old put on the new…

 

[Deidr]

Some of you guys might remember when I made a post about having same-sex attraction and navigating beginner Christianity. It kinda blew up on the site and I had some great healthy discussions with many of you!

It's been quite a while now. I've grown in my faith considerably and continue to. It has recently occurred to me that the same-sex attraction has become weaker & I appreciate my fiance's masculinity when I previously blanked it due to having attraction to femininity.

I do still find women attractive but when I have those thoughts basically I remind myself I am committed to my fiance and said attraction is unnatural anyway. I manually change the attraction from romantic/lust into simply an appreciation of beauty much like a straight woman feels when she sees a fellow woman and thinks she is beautiful. (If I make sense.)

It's been getting a lot easier over time. I've also completely stopped engaging with pornography and self-serving activity which I'm mentioning because I believe that change has contributed to my same-sex attraction being weaker.

I just felt I'd be a hypocrite not to post this as my initial post was an honest open account of what life is like when you're a Christian but you have same-sex attraction, and this is an important follow-up as I feel we as a community can learn from honest experiences and not just people's assumptions pushed on us by media.

I don't feel empty, deprived or miserable. I feel more peaceful actually. And closer to my partner.

The mainstream understanding is that sexuality is totally fixed and can not change, and any attempt to change it is dangerous and causes misery. I can't go with a narrative if I'm not living that narrative anymore.

Could this be an act of God? Or is it more about me turning away from sin and having my priorities in life be more God-orientated? Perhaps it is both! I think it is interesting to theorize.

I'd love to answer any questions you have about the topic! I'm here to be 100% honest as I feel this is how we can help the community understand the issue better, whether you are a Christian with same-sex attractions or on the flip side a firm straight Christian who has questions.

I appreciate your transparency.
I don't know the answer, but can give an opinion.
Sounds like you are making choices because of who you are choosing to follow.

 

[PrimFinallyFoundGod!]

If you Sincerely changed?. Proverbs chapter 1, many people are not sincere and diligent about God. God won't listen to their prayers or bless them.
I'm not judging anyone.
If the person converted to christianity and repentance of sins to God, Acts chapter 3. God forgives sins. Know this. No one can con God. Jesus knows what everyone is thinking and their motives.

James chapter 1, be doers of the word, not hearers only, deceiving your own selves. This is bottom line.
Galatians chapter 5, walking in the flesh is the downfall for many people. Being led by the spirit, is being doers of God's word. Get the picture.

My brother, narcissist, joined church recently. I'm not judging him. Its smoke screen. He believes in rapture theory and listening to traditions of men.
God hates false teachings. Will God listen to Christian who is involved with false doctrine??. The answer is obvious.

Peace.

Definitely being honest

 

[PrimFinallyFoundGod!]

I lean Calvinist. That’s not to start a debate it’s just so you know what I bring to the discussion. So…

Genuine conversions are a work of God. God changes His people over time. Active homosexual lifestyles are not of God. So…

I think and believe He will put off the old put on the new…

Can you explain Calvinism to me better? I find conflicting info online

 

[PrimFinallyFoundGod!]

I appreciate your transparency.
I don't know the answer, but can give an opinion.
Sounds like you are making choices because of who you are choosing to follow.

Yes that feels about right to me. I do have the attractions but I catch myself and change it, and I also appreciate my fiance more than ever

 

[Deidr]

Yes that feels about right to me. I do have the attractions but I catch myself and change it, and I also appreciate my fiance more than ever

And we all have to make choices. We can't have everything we desire because everything we desire is not good for us. At some point in many of our lives many of us would have been so called hoes...

I myself just rebuke evil thoughts and cast them away. Cast out every vain imagination that sets itself against the knowledge of God. We have to count the cost.

Continue gurl to do what u doing..for scripture says if we resist the devil he will flee.

This scripture is for me too -dont Quote FOR NOT SAYING IT WORD FOR WORD.

WHAT WOULD IT COST A MAN IF HE GAIN THE WHOLE WORLD BUT LOSE HIS SOUL? WHAT WILL A MAN GIVE IN EXCHANGE FOR HIS LIFE.

Scripture does say narrow is the way and few who find it.
And maybe He is the Narrow way. I dont think we live until we really die to our own self desires directed at our own will.

 

[Christ_empowered]

Yes please

My only point is that God’s people are preselected. He knows us long before we give a second thought to Him. We are His handiwork….our lives are not our own…

So I tend to think that it’s a matter of cooperating with the Holy Spirit as He transforms us in Christ.

 

[eddif]

Yes please

My only point is that God’s people are preselected. He knows us long before we give a second thought to Him. We are His handiwork….our lives are not our own…

So I tend to think that it’s a matter of cooperating with the Holy Spirit as He transforms us in Christ.

Ephesians 1:4 kjv
4. According as he hath chosen us in him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and without blame before him in love:
5. Having predestinated us unto the adoption of children by Jesus Christ to himself, according to the good pleasure of his will,
6. To the praise of the glory of his grace, wherein he hath made us accepted in the beloved.

I backed up to before the foundation of the world. I suppose the earliest plan:
A behavior plan?

Seems to say by adoption.

Mississippi redneck
eddif

 

[Christ_empowered]

You’re correct of course. I think sometimes I like to think that I play a bigger part In sanctification than I do,.,ego much? Lol

 

[CherubRam]

Something to think about:
Romans 1:26
Because of this, God gave them over to shameful lusts. Even their women exchanged natural sexual relations for unnatural ones.

 

[Christ_empowered]

I try to remind myself of those verses…

On the one hand I do think there’s a biological basis for an inclination towards homosexuality. On the other hand

Even modern research shows a correlation between homosexuality and narcissism. Eek

 

[evenifigoalone]

I think that someone being gay/bi/same sex attracted and "being given over to lusts" are two different things. If you are overtaken by that stuff, that's one thing, but just having the attraction doesn't mean you're beyond help.

(I do define attraction and lust as different things. Attraction is as natural and involuntary for most people as breathing, lust is an action you take, even if just in thoughts.)

 

[Christ_empowered]

This is true. The association with narcissistic traits is more in self identified gay men from what little I’ve skimmed on the subject. Honestly? Especially in urban areas I think gay subcultures encourage narcissistic behavior and outlooks. It’s like…a young person starts out homosexual and then becomes gay through the urban gay subculture…,

An identity that seems to be maintained over the years for most people. I dunno

 

[Alfred Persson]

Some of you guys might remember when I made a post about having same-sex attraction and navigating beginner Christianity. It kinda blew up on the site and I had some great healthy discussions with many of you!

It's been quite a while now. I've grown in my faith considerably and continue to. It has recently occurred to me that the same-sex attraction has become weaker & I appreciate my fiance's masculinity when I previously blanked it due to having attraction to femininity.

I do still find women attractive but when I have those thoughts basically I remind myself I am committed to my fiance and said attraction is unnatural anyway. I manually change the attraction from romantic/lust into simply an appreciation of beauty much like a straight woman feels when she sees a fellow woman and thinks she is beautiful. (If I make sense.)

It's been getting a lot easier over time. I've also completely stopped engaging with pornography and self-serving activity which I'm mentioning because I believe that change has contributed to my same-sex attraction being weaker.

I just felt I'd be a hypocrite not to post this as my initial post was an honest open account of what life is like when you're a Christian but you have same-sex attraction, and this is an important follow-up as I feel we as a community can learn from honest experiences and not just people's assumptions pushed on us by media.

I don't feel empty, deprived or miserable. I feel more peaceful actually. And closer to my partner.

The mainstream understanding is that sexuality is totally fixed and can not change, and any attempt to change it is dangerous and causes misery. I can't go with a narrative if I'm not living that narrative anymore.

Could this be an act of God? Or is it more about me turning away from sin and having my priorities in life be more God-orientated? Perhaps it is both! I think it is interesting to theorize.

I'd love to answer any questions you have about the topic! I'm here to be 100% honest as I feel this is how we can help the community understand the issue better, whether you are a Christian with same-sex attractions or on the flip side a firm straight Christian who has questions.

Congratulations. Satan tempts us with all sorts of sins, drugs, drunkenness, theft, etc. I was addicted to cigarettes, couldn't stop. But I learned a secret I use to also defeat other "bad desires".

Will power doesn't work, it actually feeds the desire the more one tries to "not do it." Therefore, will power can fail often.

But a competing good desire can quench a bad desire. Whenever a desire for a cigarette arose I would defeat it by focusing on my desire to breath without an oxygen apparatus.

Or if the temptation arose for what would prevent me from entering the Kingdom:

9 Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites,
10 nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God. (1 Cor. 6:9-10 NKJ)

I focus on my desire to live with God my Father, my LORD Jesus Christ, and God the Holy Spirit in His Kingdom, in God's light and love. I really want that. My desire to live with God is greater than any desire for evil doing. Its then easy to say: "NO"

I "submit" to the love of God, who loved me first (1 Jn. 4:19), crying out to Him to destroy the temptation, to deliver me from the evil one (Mt. 6:3):

7 Therefore submit (5293 ὑποτάσσω hupotasso) to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you.
8 Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-minded.
9 Lament and mourn and weep! Let your laughter be turned to mourning and your joy to gloom.
10 Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord, and He will lift you up. (Jas. 4:7-10 NKJ)

5293 ὑποτάσσω hupotasso {hoop-ot-as'-so}

Meaning: 1) to arrange under, to subordinate 2) to subject, put in subjection 3) to subject one's self, obey 4) to submit to one's control 5) to yield to one's admonition or advice 6) to obey, be subject

 

[Riven]

I think that someone being gay/bi/same sex attracted and "being given over to lusts" are two different things. If you are overtaken by that stuff, that's one thing, but just having the attraction doesn't mean you're beyond help.

(I do define attraction and lust as different things. Attraction is as natural and involuntary for most people as breathing, lust is an action you take, even if just in thoughts.)

I don't see how one cannot lust. Attraction is like the precursor to lust. You can't lust after something you aren't attracted to.